Motherhood 2.0

As I type this out, a precious little angel is sleeping against my chest, breathing softly and gently, the trace of a smile lingering on her tiny face. Just over four weeks old, she seems to be thriving beautifully as evidenced by the growing rolls on her thighs. She is officially just a teeny bit too long for newborn sleepers even though I just shoved her into one because I am unwilling to surrender it - the smiling frogs on the front pockets and the adorable little ruffle around the tushie area are overwhelmingly cute. We have definitely had some struggles with sleep deprivation, painful feedings, and worries concerning her lingering jaundice but it is all forgotten when we gaze into her gorgeous blue eyes and watch them carefully survey the room, wide and alert, absorbing every sight and sound.

Lots of people have asked about my adjustment to life with two children. It has definitely been challenging. I have had moments of slight depression when I realize how much longer it takes to get ready to go outside for a walk, to the park, to the store. It seems that when I have to be somewhere at a given time, I must allow myself at least 45 minutes to ensure that the baby is properly fed, Matthew is completely dressed (the kid likes to randomly take off his pants at the most inopportune times), and I am showered and wearing an outfit that does not include yoga pants. It will take some time to adjust but I can already see that we are improving.

Despite these obvious and expected adjustments, I have noticed that I am finding Emma's infant stage so much more enjoyable. I am more confident, more self-assured in my role as a mother. I have successfully  nurtured one child from infancy to his current phase of toddler stubbornness and I know that I can do it again, perhaps drawing upon the mistakes and lessons learned during my previous experience to improve my parenting skills. This sense of peace has enabled me to relax and just enjoy caring for this tiny little person...this incredible gift from God that has been entrusted to my care. Earlier this week, as I sat on my bed feeding Emma while Matthew snuggled into my side with a book to read, I was a bit overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude for my life.  I have a caring husband, two beautifully healthy children, a comfortable home, and a supportive network of friends and family. God is so good and I am so incredibly blessed.

The piles of laundry will continue to grow, the house will not seem as clean as before, and the dishes might take a teeny bit longer to make their way into the dishwasher, but I am okay with that. I do not want to miss a single opportunity to snuggle with my baby girl and her big brother.